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BREAKING NEWS

"Art needs to reflect the modern age, so the classics need a deconstructionist update, says queer artist Pierre LaFlaire.

Top stories

by Adel Gastrow

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major ANNOUNCEMENT

Grand prize is a two-night stay in casino's Roman Emperor Suite

by Adel Gastrow

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Exclusive

Serious measures are being taken to prevent AOC's cultural appropriation of Asian culture from happening again

by Adel Gastrow

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TOP STORIES

Game maker promises tweaks to privilege scoring system to address criticisms of intersectional feminists

by Shay Guvera

“The Race Card” card game gains popularity among college students

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Studies show that left-wing ideologues are more likely to graduate from higher education thanks to the increase in number of gender, sexuality, and African-American studies departments opening across the nation

by Carla Marks

It’s Been Proven That Liberals Are Smarter Than Conservatives

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Select Slutwalk participants report receiving engraved invitations to participate in ribbon cutting ceremony, excited to attend

by Lenny Trot

In show of solidarity with campus LGBT community, frat boys unveil gender-neutral, outdoor communal shower facility

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“We thank all of our investors for making it possible, and will make the shirts available to them at below market prices”

by  Valarie Lennon

Marxist Student Association reaches crowdfunding goal, confirms anti-Capitalist t-shirts will be sold through multi-level marketing

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“Being privileged, the least I can do is help these ladies improve their chances of admission to elite law schools,” says Harvey

by Josephine Stylin

Harvey, long-time janitor in Women’s Studies building, finds redemption in tutoring coeds in Oppressive Patriarchy course.

INVESTIGATIONS

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MY LIFE AS AN UNDERCOVER FEMINIST

What's really going on inside the iron walls of underground conservatism on college campuses?  The truth may shock you.

PART ONE:  The Underbelly of Progressive Education

PART TWO:  Going Rogue

PART THREE: Night of the Living Capitalist (early access for Patreon members)

by Adel Gastrow

early access for PATREON MEMBERS

Patreon members receive at least two weeks early access to all content, among other privileges.

by Carla Marks

School District approves non-binary, environmentally conscious version of Noah’s Ark story for 5th grade curriculum

Creationists object, citing “scientific impossibility” of homosexual reproduction among pilgrim animals and lack of “longitudinal data” to prove global warming cause of epic flood

by Nikki Kruchev

Woke Forest University invites authors of complex Uniform Commercial Code to draft model contract for sexual consent

“We like how the UCC imposes gap filler provisions when the intent of the parties cannot be determined”

by Fred Engel

Restroom controversy delays construction of Safe Space for students who self-identify as extraterrestrial creatures

Construction to resume once blue ribbon, blue haired panel of Gender Studies professors defines proper gender classifications for extraterrestrials

by Shay Guvera

Well-traveled NYU sorority sister has now visited every Starbucks in every ethic enclave throughout greater New York City (and has the Instagram evidence to prove it)

Encourages her Eastern European, Holocaust survivor neighbors to travel more as a means to “broaden their understanding of the world”

by Moe Zedong

Professor of Postmodernism invited to teach weekend master course on “hidden metanarratives of words” to elite NSA code-breakers

“We know the phrase ‘May I help you carry that,’ when uttered by a white male, actually means ‘You have no agency, power or privilege to carry that by yourself’ brilliantly explains the Professor in her course summary

by Josephine Stylin

With demand for sexual harassment complaints outpacing supply, Gender and Inclusion Office targets Muslim refugees for admissions outreach

“How else are we going to make our numbers this quarter,” asks GIO Director

by Carla Marks

Planned Parenthood to take special precautions for this year's "Take Our Daughters and Sons to Work Day"

With abortion now legal through the child's fifth birthday (for the mental health of the mother), employees' children will be issued colored bracelets to prevent "avoidable mistakes"

by Valarie Lennon

Blasey-Ford Foundation For the Performing Arts Announces New Fellowship

Recipient will receive all-expense paid trip to D.C. to testify against the male judicial nominee of her choice

by Adel Gastrow

Vindication for wage parity activists at last!

College admissions scandal disclosures prove female coaches received only 77% of bribe money received by their male counterparts